Can True Friends Joke With Each Other?

True friends roast you and still raise a toast to you.
The Day Warrior

The other day, I watched something on the news that was incredibly funny. Yet, many of the people interviewed couldn’t see past their convictions, stereotypes, and preconceptions to enjoy the humor of the moment. It struck me—what a sad place it would be if we lost our ability to laugh, especially at ourselves.

Humor challenges our boundaries. It exists in that uncomfortable space between right and wrong, reminding us of our humanity. It allows us to explore difficult topics without taking them too seriously.

And that got me thinking: If you can’t joke with your friends, are you really friends?

The Answer

The answer is a resounding no.

True friends can joke with each other.

True friends roast you and still raise a toast to you.

At its core, humor is about connection, trust, and accountability. It’s a way of keeping each other in check while making life a little more fun.

Why is Humor Among Friends Important?

The idea that “if you can’t talk shit to your friends,” points to a more profound truth about holding each other accountable.

Here’s why it matters:

Trust and Comfort: Being able to tease or “talk shit” without fear of ruining the friendship shows a level of mutual trust. You’re confident they won’t take it incorrectly because they know your intentions aren’t malicious. It’s like an unwritten pact: we’re secure enough to mess with each other.
Authenticity: Real friends don’t walk on eggshells. If you’re stuck in polite, surface-level chit-chat, it’s more like a coworker vibe than a friendship. Talking shit—playfully calling out quirks or flaws—means you’re past the fake niceties and can be your unfiltered self.
Bonding Through Humor: Roasting each other is a love language for some. It’s a way to laugh together, test resilience, and build a shared history of inside jokes. The dynamic stays shallow if you can’t handle the heat or dish it back.
Strength of Connection: Friendships that survive playful jabs are often robust. It’s a sign you’ve moved beyond fragile early BFF stages into something durable—where you don’t have to prove anything, enjoy the messiness of being human together.

Final Thoughts

A friend who can laugh with you can also stand by you. If your friendships are too delicate for playful banter, ask yourself: Are they built on true connection or just convenience?

Holding your friends accountable can being an intimidating task and if they cannot handle some quick witted jibes, how are they going to handle more impactful topics?

True friendship isn’t about constant agreement—it’s about knowing that, no matter what, you’ve got each other’s backs… even when you’re cracking jokes.

The Day Warrior

How to find more content from The Day Warrior:

If you enjoyed this newsletter, please subscribe.

If you want to support The Day Warrior or purchase my book, Getting A Little Better Every Day, check out my new online shop: https://thedaywarrior.sellfy.store

If you want to provide feedback, please take The Day Warrior Survey.

If you want to have a deeper discussion about this subject, please get in touch with The Day Warrior.

Follow me on X for daily short and long-form content: @thedaywarrior.

My LinkedIn information is here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/the-day-warrior/

I am also on Instagram: @thedaywarrior.

My website is http:/thedaywarrior.com.